Occasionally chugging a cheap beer just to feel alive again. PGP.

Getting upset because your favorite candle was discontinued #PGP

My firm’s new cost-cutting strategy is reducing the number of days we have janitors to only 3 days a week. Fortune 500. PGP.

Being ‘random drug test’ nervous. PGP

“Well… Yes and no.” PGP.

Being caught on Tinder is worse than being caught texting. PGP.

I got way too excited when I found out my new job has a parking garage. PGP

I’m going to get a haircut today and update my LinkedIn photo. PGP.

Exactly an hour late today

Half of my tax return is paying to fix the bumper of a CEO’s car I scraped in the building parking garage last weekend. PGP.