My car is too old to drive for uber

I wish I was half as happy as I sound in my emails. PGP.

It will take me approximately 157 years at my current salary to earn what 21 year old Jordan Speith has earned so far in 2015. PGP

I go on vacation tomorrow. I mentally checked out yesterday. PGP

Signed a new lease on Friday, got notified on Monday I’m being moved to Connecticut. PGP.

Office coffee machine broke. I’m about to lose my shit. PGP

Read, respond, delete 5 emails, refresh, 10 more pop into inbox. PGP.

Wishing work hours went by as fast as lunch hour. PGP.

Having too much to do and not enough approval to do it.

Having the body figure and sleep schedule of your grandfather who is three times your age. PGP.