Calling in sick to work results in me being hyper paranoid that everyone knows I lied. Can’t decide if its really worth it. PGP.

Mandatory webinar at 6 p.m. PGP.

If only buying Geico car insurance was all it took to get me on the Gravy Train. PGP.

I have a constant day dream of watching “The Big Lebowski” in my bathtub while eating a large pizza. PGP.

The fake half-smile/head nod combo you give people in the hallways. PGP.

Manager told me I should have a business card. Been with the company three and a half years. PGP.

Bob Wiley taking a vacation from his problems. PGP.

Trying to get your older coworker to take you to Costco on your lunch break. PGP.

The most I’ve done all day is help a buddy in grad school with his homework. PGP.

Sitting in your cubicle, questioning why you didn’t get piss ass drunk on more random Tuesdays in college. PGP.