People in the office have already started talking about the Halloween costume contest. That’s all they have to live for. PGP.

Stole a bottle of Tabasco from Chipotle today, just to feel something. Anything. PGP.

There was a fight outside my apartment last night. It was between two hobos for a piece of cardboard. PGP.

“You really need to stop treating the intern like he is a pledge from your fraternity days”-My boss. PGP.

I have a client whose last name is Bond. Every time he calls me, I say “Good evening, Mr.Bond” in an evil villain voice. He must hate me. PGP.

Having to ask the pharmacist if it’s okay to drink on your new medication. PGP.

I don’t know how long basic produce stays good for. PGP.

Stressed about having to get a haircut and go to the dry cleaners after work. PGP.

Yesterday was my boss’s birthday and we ate at a Brazilian steakhouse on the company card. Today was my birthday and I ate a Wendy’s baconator alone in my car. PGP.

I always wondered why people voluntarily stay late at work, then my girlfriend moved in with me. PGP.