“Dear God, make me a bird so I can fly far far away from here.”
“You hear about that missing plane?”
Not on spring break, but listening to Jimmy Buffet Pandora to let your boss know where your head is at. PGP.
Louis CK is perhaps the most cynical – yet brilliant – people on the planet, but his theory on The Actor’s Studio couldn’t have been more wrong.
Being so out of shape you can drink a 40 faster than you can run a 40. PGP
Receiving calls about donating to the university even though you haven’t finished paying them back for when you attended. PGP
Last year tequila sunrises on the beach, this year office spring cleaning
Being on a first name basis with the night security staff. PGP.
Going full Rust Cohle trying to track down whoever stole my snack from the office fridge
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