Using your dog as an excuse to get out of things you don’t want to do after work. PGP.

Looking up exercise programs knowing full well that you’ll never do any of them. PGP.

Girlfriend, 401(k), gym membership. Pick one. PGP.

I’m legitimately worried I won’t be able to afford a new gameday polo for this season. PGP.

“Your request to increase your credit line has been denied.” PGP.

The single pube on the top of the urinal. PGP.

Can’t wait to watch the news tonight. PGP.

Getting all excited about a raise that can barely cover the price of one extra Subway Sandwich every two weeks. PGP.

Tindering while cold calling. PGP.

Watching a series of heist and crime movies causing you to seriously consider becoming a professional criminal. PGP.