“401k” used to be where all the parties went down in our dorm. PGP.

LinkedIn is my online dating site. PGP.

“Next slide, please.” PGP.

Stirring your coffee with a pen. PGP.

Taco Bell for breakfast because you were late for work. Taco Bell for dinner because you have no self respect. PGP.

What is this work/life balance I keep hearing about? PGP.

Somehow always getting the cart at the grocery store with a loud, broken wheel. PGP.

Telling yourself, “Tomorrow’s another day,” before noon. PGP.

Refusing to even go after an attractive coworker for fear of being the “office couple.” PGP.

The walk of shame now being the distance from the restroom to your cubicle after being in there for an absurd amount of time. PGP.