My co-workers still ask how my ex is doing. PGP.

One too many glasses of pinot while watching the bachelorette and I now have a 6-month membership to match.com. #PGP

Helping people find their dream job was not my dream. #PGP

That’s what I love about these interns, man. I get older, they stay the same age. PGP.

HR still uses internet explorer. #PGP

Fat, but not happy.

I can relate to only 15% of the pop culture references my boss makes. PGP.

You make a drunken scene at one family wedding, and no one lets you live it down. PGP

I don’t piss excellence in the morning. I piss dark roast. PGP

“Who do I need to notify that the office toilet won’t flush?” PGP