Accidentally submitted a column as a wall post. PGP.

Didn’t blackout during my entire visit to my parents’ house. It’s a Christmas miracle!! PGP.

Exactly 1 person has to be physically in the office on Christmas Eve “in case of emergencies.” That person is me. PGP.

I didn’t get anything in the office Secret Santa exchange, and I don’t know who to be pissed at. PGP.

7:30 a.m. on a Monday and someone has already destroyed the bathroom. PGP.

Old enough for wrinkles, young enough for acne. PGP.

Accidentally dressed exactly like my boss today. He thinks I’m mocking him. PGP.

Fuck it. I’m getting wine tonight. PGP.

Saw my sister on Tinder. PGP.

It is currently 11:00 p.m. on a Monday. I am 7 whiskeys deep. Tomorrow will suck. PGP.