All Mint.com does is remind me that the majority of my income is spent on alcohol. PGP.

Looking at Paris on Google Earth because you can’t afford vacation this summer. PGP.

I don’t remember the last time my bank account hit 5 digits. PGP.

90% of the emails I send start with “Sorry for the delay.” PGP.

There’s nothing like pouring off-brand syrup on off-brand Eggo waffles to remind you that your college degree was abso-fucking-lutely worth it. PGP.

“Show me the law where it says we can’t make interns do wall-sits.” PGP.

An absolutely horrific day of golf is still better than a good day in the office. PGP.

Black coffee. Black pants. Black laptop. Black pen. Black soul. PGP.

Twenty-five sittin’ on 25…one dollar bills. PGP.

Sure working at Initech was soul-crushing, and Lumbergh was a douche, but at least they got Hawaiian shirt Fridays. PGP.