When the most athletic thing you do all day is side-stepping a coworker to avoid an office collision. PGP.

Becoming your boss’s scapegoat. PGP.

Feeling like your life is an episode of Seinfeld, and you’re Costanza. PGP.

Telling yourself that you will run in the morning, and then hitting snooze so many times that you have to skip breakfast. PGP.

The sheer anxiety you get before asking for vacation days. PGP.

Stealing toiletries from your parent’s house on a visit home. PGP.

Taking the elevator to the second floor. PGP.

Somehow feeling that one beer before bed the following morning. PGP.

Ending an email with a blatantly sarcastic “Thanks!” PGP.

Having to censor yourself on a regular basis. PGP.

Scheduling your own dentist appointments. PGP.

A disgruntled employee CC’ed the entire division in an angry email to our boss, so a cop has been patrolling the office. PGP.