Three office birthdays in the past month. I’ve gained six pounds. PGP.

Smoking cigarettes to increase your metabolism. PGP.

My parents got me a self help book for my birthday. PGP.

Getting hit on by a cougar and iced out by someone your age. PGP.

I don’t know if I’m shaking from the caffeine or the hangover. PGP.

Immediately regretting giving yourself that deadline. PGP.

I’m not working FIFO or LIFO. I’m working FILO. PGP.

Last year’s Summer intern just got hired to the same position I’m in. PGP.

A 23-year-old just won the World Cup for his country. All I’ve done for mine is pay taxes. PGP.

Engaging in an all day “thermostat battle” with an unknown coworker. PGP.

Lowering your desired salary with each passing interview. PGP.

Contemplating how much longer you can really last at your job during every Monday morning staff meeting. PGP.