If I have to hear one more “were you really sick or just hungover?” joke I swear to god. PGP.

A younger co-worker finally came through and brought me weed.

“Where are we at on this?” PGP.

The tentative outlook accept being the professional equivalent of imessage read receipts. PGP

I really need to stop opening a tab at happy hour. PGP.

“Just a heads-up…” PGP.

Got my friend a job at my office. Now I hate him. PGP.

Just as Young Jeezy would say, I need a vacation. PGP.

My girlfriend is jealous of my work wife. PGP.

Carpooling with the work wife. PGP

Used Subway’s private bathroom, then walked next door to McDonald’s for lunch. PGP

Going from one earbud in to two earbuds in. PGPowerMove.