“You’ll need to stay late to wait for their response.” PGP.

Inner voice is saying, “Get fucked.” Outer voice is saying, “Yeah, I’ll come in this weekend to help.” PGP.

My tuition costs were higher than my current salary. PGP.

Needing two hands to count LinkedIn connections who are also former hookups

I enjoy conversations about the weather with random strangers. PGP.

“What do you mean you don’t have bottomless mimo’s?” PGP.

Someone viewing my profile on LinkedIn is more exciting than a match on Tinder. PGP.

Random, client required drug tests. PGP.

Wearing noise-canceling headphones do nothing to stop coworkers from bothering me. PGP

Bosley hair transplant commercials suddenly becoming relevant. PGP

Helped a friend move a dresser and a mattress last week. Still sore. PGP.

Why am I seeing a bunch of videos of people running in place? PGP.