April, 22 and the box of random drug tests is delivered to the office. PGP.

Too old for tinder. Too young for Match. PGP.

Had a nightmare that I wore jeans on Thursday thinking it was casual Friday. PGP.

The sense of relief you feel when a second tier friend cancels plans. PGP.

29 hours till Happy Hour. 88 hours till Game of Thrones. 3055 hours till College Football. PGP.

I think my friends intentionally decide to get married during football season just to spite me. PGP.

Your boss casually pranking you in the airport by placing a gun shaped turbo lighter and Japanese adult mags in your carry-on bag while you’re away to get coffee for him. PGP.

Just found out the company is sending me on a trip over Memorial Day weekend to a dry county. PGP.

Used Groupon on a first date. PGPowerMove.

Really not knowing how to socialize with babies and always ending up being the weird one petting their heads. PGP.

Went from working with all women in health care to a job in sales. Landed a work husband the first day. PGP.

“My youngest son is right around your age.” PGP.

I am more competitive in spring softball than in my job search. PGP.

Requested PTO to take off last Friday. Manager approved it this morning. PGP.

Coming back to a voicemail after your morning dump. PGP.

Excited for summer because traffic will be lighter. PGP.

Subtle sense of defeat when barista doesn’t fill up your coffee to the brim. Greater sense of defeat when you spill half-empty cup of coffee on your ironed shirt. PGP.

Went paintballing this weekend, no one in the office believes that the bruise on my neck isn’t a hickey. PGP.

Half the city is under water, still got chewed out for being 15 minutes late. PGP.

Looks like someone got some sun this weekend. PGP.