Pretending to be busy to get out of actually being busy.

Taking a sick day when you aren’t sick to avoid your office full of coworkers who refuse to take a sick day when they are. PGP.

Getting an email from your boss on Friday evening that begins with “Do this first thing when you get in on Monday.” PGP.

My job makes me change my password every two weeks. PGP.

My boss signs his emails “Smiles.” PGP.

Monday’s are for lighting fires you’ll have to put out by Friday. PGP.

Volunteered to take minutes one time… now I’m known as Minute Man. PGP.

Birthday greetings from your credit card company reminding you your bill is due. PGP.

“Please apply through our online portal.” Also known as the place where resumes go to die. PGP.

The overly talkative coworker that asks, “Why do you wear headphones?” PGP.