My knees hurt just watching the NBA. PGP.

Bought tickets for a concert on a weekday over two months ago. Sold them yesterday because I didn’t want to stay out too late. PGP.

I’m gonna just ride the rest of this day out on the toilet. PGP.

Staying up late to see who your boss’s team drafts so you have something to talk about. PGP.

That one coworker who acts like the office mother. PGP.

I’m looking for a friend with competitive benefits. Less sexting and more 401k. PGP.

My boss asked me to train the new guy. Just found out the new guy will be my new supervisor. PGP.

Caught myself tapping my foot along to the on-hold music. PGP.

Don’t trust anyone who can take a work dump in less than 8 minutes. PGP.

Accidentally calling your boss “mom.” PGP.