Actually thinking of cutting back on my drinking. PGP.

Got locked into another year contract of shitty cable because I forgot to cancel my service. PGP.

Being that guy who brings store bought items to the monthly company potluck. PGP.

Wondering what would happen if I just “forgot” to come back to work after lunch. PGP.

My friends are all getting engaged. I’m still puking on street corners. PGP.

I found out my current job was posted on LinkedIn, so I applied for it. PGPM.

Management has been asking for people to volunteer to take days off to save money on payroll. I volunteered tomorrow so I can go to a job interview. PGPM.

Just swiped right because I saw granite counters and stainless steel. PGP.

Dumping a girl due to her obscene student loan debt. PGP.

Spent the past two days fixing the summer interns’ mistakes. PGP.