I don’t piss excellence in the morning. I piss dark roast. PGP

“Who do I need to notify that the office toilet won’t flush?” PGP

“You look like you could use a vacation”

Everyone in my office assumes they’re invited to my wedding. PGP

Sometimes I feel unprofessional for being a freelancer who works from home..But then I just roll over and take a 2:00 pm nap.

Looking forward to listening to my new audio book on my commute home tonight. #PGP

Debating if my ability to lie to clients is a credit to my resourcefulness or a sign of my lack of morality

“Reaching out” to people instead of just emailing or calling them. PGP

Your boss complaining about being broke. PGP.