I work for a “work hard, play hard” company. PGP.

Just spent my morning creating fake meetings on my Outlook calendar for Friday so people can’t hijack it with their bullshit. PGP.

Trying to sync up the gym exit with hot girl from the gym. PGP.

Accepted an offer for a new job today and leave for Vegas tomorrow. My out of office is just going to be “I will be out Friday and not will not be returning.” PGP.

Took up golfing as a hobby because pride is overrated. PGP.

Young coworker telling you if they work hard they’ll get a raise and a promotion. PGP.

Went down a floor in my office building to throw up this morning so my co-workers don’t think I’m a degenerate. PGP.

Missed my connecting flight and had to sleep in the Detroit Airport. PGP.

Playoff games keep me up way past my bedtime. PGP.