“So no one told you life was gonna be this way. Your job’s a joke, you’re broke, your love life’s D.O.A. It’s like you’re always stuck in second gear. When it hasn’t been your day, your week, your month, or even your year.” PGP.

“Welcome to Chipot– oh hey man, you want the usual?” PGP.

My boss started adding a question mark to his usual “See you Monday” farewell before the weekend. PGP.

Can’t remember the last time I bought Gatorade for a sports-related reason. PGP.

After getting your first house, the most exciting purchases you make are a grill and lawn mower. PGP.

Getting yelled at for not responding to an email your boss forgot to send in the first place. PGP.

Finishing your work well in advance of when it’s due, but only handing it in slightly early to avoid being given more work. PGP.

Your boss saying, “We’ll see,” meaning the same thing it did when your parents said it twenty years ago. PGP.