I do not remember how to have a conversation that is not about work.

I refuse to admit that I’ve outgrown day drinking. PGP.

I don’t always take a shit at work, but when I do, I take at least half an hour. PGP.

My cubicle is basically just a cesspool of my own farts.

Today, LinkedIn asked me how I know my father.

I like to consider myself the Gordon Gecko of data entry.

I don’y always drink beer, but when I do…its whatever is cheapest and I get absolutely annihilated.

“So how prepared are we for the corporate audits next week” PGP.

Just got an outlook invite for an ice cream and cake party to celebrate my last day of work. Fuck. PGP