Pretty sure I’m getting catfished on Tinder. PGP.

You know it’s going to be a good day when you get your side part in a straight line on your first try. PGP.

I’ll probably just get more coffee at 4:20. PGP.

Paying for your unemployed friends bar tab, because it’s the right thing to do. PGP.

Wedding I went to ended up being a cash bar.

Was too embarrassed to tell my doctor that I haven’t slept with anyone since my last visit.

Automatically downloading the apple watch app but not being anywhere close to being able to afford the actual watch #PGP

Received a congratulatory email for a promotion in error.

Moved to the 3rd biggest city in the U.S. for work…and don’t know anyone. PGP.

Stayed up three hours past my bed time last night. Woke up feeling hungover. I didn’t even drink last night. PGP