I work for a “work hard, play hard” company. PGP.

Just spent my morning creating fake meetings on my Outlook calendar for Friday so people can’t hijack it with their bullshit. PGP.

Had a dream I was at Chili’s. Woke up disappointed. PGP.

Sometimes office drama is the only thing that gets me through the day. PGP.

Trying to sync up the gym exit with hot girl from the gym. PGP.

I can’t tell if the Michelob Ultra Weekend in Review is satire, but all my friends have recently started drinking it exclusively. PGP.

My colleague told me that I can do better than my current company and to “dream big.” PGP.

Got the first sunburns of the season this weekend. The longest period of time I was outside was an hour for brunch on the patio. PGP.

Last week on the job and trying to pretend like I still give a shit. PGP.

Realized at a high school grad party that I’m the drunk cousin. PGP.