Sometimes I just sit in the bathroom and think about life. PGP.

My local hooters closed. PGP.

I have a work mom rather than a work wife. PGP.

Taking a PTO day and waking up with 70 emails in my inbox. PGP.

The increase of my FICO score has been the only highlight of 2017. PGP.

My coworkers were talking about their stock returns the other day and the only thing I was thinking about was how fast I shotgunned that beer after work Friday. PGP.

I thought my boss was being generous when he told me to take the Friday after Thanksgiving off. He docked me a day’s pay for not coming in. PGP.

I deleted the Bumble app, but not my account six months ago. Today my girlfriend got a series of screenshots from her sister when she came across my profile. PGP.

Minimizing your group chat at the right time by knowing the sound of everyone in the office’s footsteps. PGP.

We’ve officially run out of generic tums and ibuprofen in the office medicine closet. I’m the only one who ever goes in there.. PGP.