Every time I fake interest in a useless meeting a little part of me dies

My condoms expired.

“I should probably stretch first”. PGP.

Pretending to be religious to get out of work on Friday PGP.

Giving your liver a nice, healthy break from Monday to Wednesday. PGP.

Having to learn from Forbes Magazine that my undergraduate degree is useless. PGP.

I really need to get started on my taxes. PGP

I chose the wrong career path. PGP

It’s only Wednesday. PGP

Some college kids at a bar refereed to me “Blue” last night. PGP