The copier feeds off of toner and fear. PGP.

Trying to look as angry as possible on the train so nobody sits next to you. PGP.

Insider trading via Snapchat. PGP.

“We’re sorry, but AT&T U-Verse is not available in your area.” PGP.

Having to fake laugh at a chain email an older coworker includes you on. PGP.

Praying that the office fire drill isn’t just a drill. PGP.

Signing the “get well” card for a coworker you’ve never met. PGP.

The looks of pity you get when someone catches you making a PB&J in the kitchen. PGP.

Calling your parents and admitting, “I DIDN’T LISTEN!” PGP.

Having more food in your cubicle than you have in your own kitchen. PGP.

Stealing toilet paper from the hotel you stayed at on your last business trip. PGP.

Responding with “Let’s not play pass the blame here, okay?” when someone asks you a simple question in a conference call. PGP.