Hating overtime. PGP.

Couples who publicly celebrate monthiversaries, we’re not in middle school anymore. PGP.

That soul crushing moment when you realize the report you’ve been working on for the last month will be glanced at once. If you’re lucky. PGP.

Giving yourself a pep talk in the parking lot, trying to get motivated to enter the building. PGP.

This is my coffee mug. There are many like it, but this one is mine. PGP.

Finishing your work well in advance of when it’s due, but only handing it in slightly early to avoid being given more work. PGP.

Your boss saying, “We’ll see,” meaning the same thing it did when your parents said it twenty years ago. PGP.

1: “Going to decorate your cube?” 2: “Someday. With my brain splatter.” PGP.

Sometimes I wake up in the morning, look at myself in the mirror and say, “As little as possible.” PGP.

Wishing the price gun at work was a real gun so you could end your suffering. PGP.

I feel like I’m Leonardo DiCaprio from Catch Me If You Can. Every day I go to my new job, dressing and acting like I belong, and wondering when they’ll figure out I don’t know shit. PGP.

Some mornings I just want to build a fort in my bed and stay there forever. PGP.