1: “The boss’ daughter is in my fitness class I guess.” 2: “Is she hot?” PGP.

1: “Turn that down.” 2: “Turn down for WHAT!?” 1: “No, seriously. Turn your music off, I’m on the line with a customer.” PGP.

I can’t remember the last time I smiled a genuine smile. PGP.

Seriously considering purposely shitting your pants to leave work early. PGP.

Bought tickets for a concert on a weekday over two months ago. Sold them yesterday because I didn’t want to stay out too late. PGP.

I’m gonna just ride the rest of this day out on the toilet. PGP.

“It’s only half past 12, but I don’t care. It’s 5 o’clock somewhere.” PGP.

Staying up late to see who your boss’s team drafts so you have something to talk about. PGP.

That one coworker who acts like the office mother. PGP.

Getting a technical issue resolved is determined solely by how much you’re willing to let the IT guy sexually harass you. PGP.

1: “It’s supposed to rain tomorrow.” 2: “Yeah, but we really need it.” PGP.

Getting caught checking Tinder while on a date with a girl you met on Tinder. PGP.