I imagine some master alarm sounding in the IT room with flashing red lights every time I attempt to access a blocked site. PGP.

Contemplating getting into a car crash on purpose so you have a valid excuse to miss work. PGP.

Being a democrat in college and a republican after your first paycheck. PGP.

Having at least two coffee cups, a can of soda, empty mug and water bottle on your desk at any given time. PGP.

1: “Have a good weekend?” 2: “Wish I just had one more day. Just one.” PGP.

Checking LinkedIn to see if the person you’ve been emailing is hot. PGP.

I just saw a bird crash into the window, break its neck, and fall to it’s death. Lucky bastard. PGP.

I wish my boss had more vacation time. PGP.

Blasting “Hell’s Bells” while driving to an interview. PGP.

Getting an email from Monster that today’s top match is your current job with your current company. PGP.

My knees hurt just watching the NBA. PGP.

Sometimes when I’m feeling adventurous I’ll slip in a “Love you!” right before hanging up with a client. PGP.