It’s not a question of whether or not I’ll have drinks after work, it’s how many. PGP.

Drove half way to work until I realized it was Sunday.

Got drunk last night and endorsed every single one of my connections on LinkedIn. PGP.

Your boss questioning decisions that they instructed you to make. PGP.

Forgot to put on deodorant this morning. Had to train a hot new intern. She was repulsed by me. PGP.

Spent all night debating what type of fat guy I am after reading the PGP column. PGP.

Having the IT department’s extension memorized. PGP.

Jared Leto visited our office for some reason today. Almost asked him if he’s still handling the Fisher account. PGP.

I’ve forecasted the potato salad kickstarter campaign to raise more money in this month than I what I’m going to earn over the next two years. PGP.

Letting your significant other meet your parents so you can go on a date for free. PGP.

I walked a mile to get Chick-fil-a for lunch. PGP.

Parking furthest away from the door knowing it’ll be the most exercise you get all day. PGP.