My boss introduced me by the wrong name on a conference call. PGP.

Just opened Instagram and instinctively started swiping right. PGP.

“Afternoon Delight” now refers to a post-lunch BM. PGP.

Alt+Tab. PGP.

My coworker just turned on her space heater. We’re in Texas and it’s July. PGP.

Everything I want seems to require a certain level of dedication and self control. I will never have anything I want. PGP.

Not only living with your parents, but going to sleep before them. PGP.

LeBron James is demanding a max salary. I’m too scared to ask the IT guy to fix my computer. PGP.

Feeling guilty every time Wikipedia prompts you to donate, knowing that without it you wouldn’t have a degree or job. PGP.

Panicking whenever your girlfriend doesn’t want to drink, because maybe she’s pregnant. PGP.

My boss wanted to see an Excel video on YouTube, and I instinctively typed YouJizz. PGP.

When the bank teller asks if you’d like a complimentary financial planning session after looking at your account. PGP.