Giving a shit about your lawn. PGP.
The uncanny ability to turn a small task into a day-long project. PGP.
My ex-girlfriend changed her Netflix password. PGP.
I don’t know what I want to do with the rest of my life. PGP.
Fresh skid marks in my favorite bathroom stall. Day ruined. PGP.
My tinder matches are really starting to scrape the bottom of the barrel. PGP.
Fantasizing about using your extension cord to choke out the bitch in finance that keeps requesting read receipts for every email. PGP.
“I keep forgetting it’s not Monday!” -Everyone. PGP.
Ironically, my office communicator has said “Busy” all day. PGP.
An absolutely horrific day of golf is still better than a good day in the office. PGP.
Deleted my birth year on Facebook. PGP.
If I learn anything from this internship, it’s how many times I can wear my work clothes without paying for dry cleaning. PGP.