Your married Facebook friends posting sappy romantic shit on each other’s Walls. PGP.

I now have preset AM radio stations

When someone you know views your LinkedIn profile, then neglects to connect with you. PGP.

The company upgraded to 2-ply, highlight of the week so far.

Today, LinkedIn asked me how I know my father.

“Hey there! Looks like we are on the same bathroom schedule!” PGP.

Risky clicks. PGP.

If I could have seen how miserable my future was going to be when I was little kid, I would have just stayed in my hometown and opened up an action figure store.

Can’t wait to turn 25 so that my car insurance premium drops. PGP.

I took today off of work to relax and catch up on sleep. I forgot to turn my alarm off

Feeling a little depressed when you see a banner ad on postgradproblems.com for a back to school sale.

The anthem to my college welcome weekend was just played on a throwback station.