The 60 seconds it takes for the Keurig machine to turn on each morning is hell. PGP.

Getting emails from your boss that have all the information stuffed in the subject line and the only thing in the body is “Thanks.” PGP.

Fell asleep in the first quarter. PGP.

My trunk started leaking, and the heater in my wife’s car went out all in the same week. PGP.

Kinda wishing all weekday sporting events are blowouts so you can turn it off and go to bed. PGP.

We’re hiring new people and I just heard my boss say we need to “make room” for them. PGP

The southern California sales rep sends emails with the signature “InSane Diego”. PGP.

Got below perfect rating on my yearly review for attendance. I have literally taken 0 days off. PGP.

“Please resend the documents in Microsoft Word version…” PGP.

Being 25 with high blood pressure. PGP.

Waking up to Venmo charges. PGP.

Every morning my first thought is “Wow I can’t wait to go to sleep tonight.” PGP.

“Hey, you see what the powerball’s at now!?” PGP.

Still numb from that missed kick. PGP.

And another week of procrastination begins. PGP.

My iPhone says I’ve exceeded my iCloud storage so I just paid 99 cents for more but I still don’t understand the cloud. PGP.

A week after moving I was told we are moving offices near my old place. PGP.

Getting a little drunk and applying for new jobs. PGP.

The only endorsement I get on LinkedIn is social media. PGP.

I’ve been here for almost two years and I still can’t really explain what it is that I do. PGP.