Winning the company wine draw being the most productive thing you do all year. PGP.

Sympathizing with customer service reps. PGP.

I had three Christmas cookies for breakfast today. PGP.

Each day I relate more and more to Phil Dunphy. PGP.

Making more money than I ever have in my life, still managing to be broke as fuck. PGP.

It’s one thing not being able to justify being hungover to your boss, it’s another thing to no longer be able to justify it to yourself. PGP.

“Can I borrow your stapler?” PGP.

I just changed my Netflix password and got angry texts from three of my exes. HBO Go is next. PGPM.

My mind’s telling me no, but my body…My body’s telling me “yeaaahhhh” to the pizza buffet that just opened up around the corner from the office. PGP.

“If you gave a fuck about your job as much as you do football…” -My Boss. PGP.