Realizing your entry-level analyst job is a lot like administrative assistant. PGP.

My boss means to say “cease and desist.” What she actually says, every time, is “stop and decease.” Threatening and confusing, all at once. PGP.

Not wanting to be known as “The Guy Who Does Nothing,” but not wanting to actually do anything. PGP.

Family knows I hate my job and asked “Why don’t you just go for a walk on your lunch break and see who’s hiring around the city?” PGP.

If I hear the phrase “Just another day in paradise,” I’m going to kill someone.

Being the neighbor who complains about loud noise instead of the one making it. PGP.

“Synergy.” PGP.

Co workers sending out 8 year old internet memes in emails. PGP.

Sometimes I’ll print something out on the printer on the other side of the floor just to walk around the office and look busy. PGP

My Sirius XM trial just expired. PGP.