If everyone who said they’d “buy me a beer” for helping them move over the 9-year span I owned my truck actually paid up I could drink for free until I turned 40. Half the reason I sold my truck was to avoid being a source of free labor to people, moving sucks dicks, and so does asking people to pay up on reasonably small (but not insignificant) amounts of money/beer.
When you’re drowning in student loan debt and get invited out to lunch, “nah I packed my own lunch” sounds a lot better than “I’ll overdraft my account if we go anywhere that doesn’t have a dollar menu.”
Can’t wait for the lazily-written Business Insider “Millenials are Killing the Nighclub industry” article after this.. totally agree with you though, fuck these places
It takes me about 3-4 months for my mind to catch up, for better or worse. Lost 40 pounds a few years ago and it took a while to feel good about it, then that feeling lasted until I gained it all back. Just finished losing it all again, and still feel like I need to keep going.. taking before/after pics helps a lot but it’s kinda weird having that lag in perception
How hard is it to just say “uh separate checks please?” If you’re buying food to share it, share it generously, but chalk it up to being your problem on the bill. if you expect everyone to venmo an amount less than 5 bucks you’re gonna have a bad time.
A simple (not as easy) way to end being ghosted- if you notice it start happening, call em out on it. Doesn’t have to be confrontational, just something like “hey I’ve enjoyed our time together, are you still interested in getting together or should i move on?” I’ve had it happen to me and I respected the hell out of it cuz I was being too big of a pansy to tell this girl I wasn’t that into her.
glad to know I’m not the only guy on team “fuck windshield wipers.” Can’t explain why, but I find it annoying as hell when they wipe even slightly more often than absolutely necessary
I stand by all of these ideas, especially the no kid thing. Went to a wedding last year where there were at all times no less than one dozen children on the dance floor.. no adults could dance. Little shits running around like a goddamn circus ruins it for everyone
The main reason I run outside is I can’t quit whenever I want. If I run 2 miles, then I gotta run 2 more to get home. Treadmills are too easy to say “fuck it” and be done early.
Being able to be super cold when it’s hot outside is a very underrated luxury. It’s right up there with having abundant cold water and unlimited cell data
1. Get voicemail from mom
2. Get text-asking if I’ve checked the vm
3. Listen to vm (it just says to call her)
4. Throw my phone into a large body of water
it the nostalgia gets the best of you, you can come to Kentucky where it’s still legal to smoke in bars. You’ll leave smelling like an ashtray even if you don’t smoke, it’s not that rad.
Stupid, but slight relevant story; a few years ago at a bachelor party, we were meeting up at the grooms place before the weekend, and our rowdiest friend got the apartment number wrong, walked into some random person’s place holding his dick and yelled “who ordered the big fat sausage pizza!” like a sweaty frat-boy version of the Kool-Aid man. The tenant, who was a nude man eating a bowl of cereal, was terrified and definitely didn’t find it as funny as the rest of us.
The first 3 years out of college I went to the same gym between 3 and 7 days a week and never made any friends there, and didn’t want to. Loud music always blasting in the headphones, little to no eye-contact, it was perfect. Now that you’ve made the friends though, it’s a whole other beast. Maybe get into running outside since it’s getting nicer out? Or try to change up the timing of when you hit the gym so you see the regulars less often.. at this point you’ve come too far to just ignore em
At 19 I took a first date to an amusement/water park and upon getting on an attraction I immediately fell, pantsed myself (in cold water) and rolled over slamming my fist into my balls, in front of my date and about a hundred people waiting in line. After that nothing else really seems embarrassing
Advertise
So… we should give them money so they can boast about getting more people to give them money? Hard pass.
If everyone who said they’d “buy me a beer” for helping them move over the 9-year span I owned my truck actually paid up I could drink for free until I turned 40. Half the reason I sold my truck was to avoid being a source of free labor to people, moving sucks dicks, and so does asking people to pay up on reasonably small (but not insignificant) amounts of money/beer.
When you’re drowning in student loan debt and get invited out to lunch, “nah I packed my own lunch” sounds a lot better than “I’ll overdraft my account if we go anywhere that doesn’t have a dollar menu.”
I mean, my family didn’t have a summer home and my parents ended up divorced.. coincidence? I think not.
Can’t wait for the lazily-written Business Insider “Millenials are Killing the Nighclub industry” article after this.. totally agree with you though, fuck these places
It takes me about 3-4 months for my mind to catch up, for better or worse. Lost 40 pounds a few years ago and it took a while to feel good about it, then that feeling lasted until I gained it all back. Just finished losing it all again, and still feel like I need to keep going.. taking before/after pics helps a lot but it’s kinda weird having that lag in perception
How hard is it to just say “uh separate checks please?” If you’re buying food to share it, share it generously, but chalk it up to being your problem on the bill. if you expect everyone to venmo an amount less than 5 bucks you’re gonna have a bad time.
A simple (not as easy) way to end being ghosted- if you notice it start happening, call em out on it. Doesn’t have to be confrontational, just something like “hey I’ve enjoyed our time together, are you still interested in getting together or should i move on?” I’ve had it happen to me and I respected the hell out of it cuz I was being too big of a pansy to tell this girl I wasn’t that into her.
glad to know I’m not the only guy on team “fuck windshield wipers.” Can’t explain why, but I find it annoying as hell when they wipe even slightly more often than absolutely necessary
Whatever, as long as they’re not the same assholes with the #HappilyEverLastname wedding hashtag.. can always just choose not to get the tattoo
I stand by all of these ideas, especially the no kid thing. Went to a wedding last year where there were at all times no less than one dozen children on the dance floor.. no adults could dance. Little shits running around like a goddamn circus ruins it for everyone
The main reason I run outside is I can’t quit whenever I want. If I run 2 miles, then I gotta run 2 more to get home. Treadmills are too easy to say “fuck it” and be done early.
Being able to be super cold when it’s hot outside is a very underrated luxury. It’s right up there with having abundant cold water and unlimited cell data
1. Get voicemail from mom
2. Get text-asking if I’ve checked the vm
3. Listen to vm (it just says to call her)
4. Throw my phone into a large body of water
it the nostalgia gets the best of you, you can come to Kentucky where it’s still legal to smoke in bars. You’ll leave smelling like an ashtray even if you don’t smoke, it’s not that rad.
Thin-crust pizza is for idiots
Stupid, but slight relevant story; a few years ago at a bachelor party, we were meeting up at the grooms place before the weekend, and our rowdiest friend got the apartment number wrong, walked into some random person’s place holding his dick and yelled “who ordered the big fat sausage pizza!” like a sweaty frat-boy version of the Kool-Aid man. The tenant, who was a nude man eating a bowl of cereal, was terrified and definitely didn’t find it as funny as the rest of us.
The first 3 years out of college I went to the same gym between 3 and 7 days a week and never made any friends there, and didn’t want to. Loud music always blasting in the headphones, little to no eye-contact, it was perfect. Now that you’ve made the friends though, it’s a whole other beast. Maybe get into running outside since it’s getting nicer out? Or try to change up the timing of when you hit the gym so you see the regulars less often.. at this point you’ve come too far to just ignore em
At 19 I took a first date to an amusement/water park and upon getting on an attraction I immediately fell, pantsed myself (in cold water) and rolled over slamming my fist into my balls, in front of my date and about a hundred people waiting in line. After that nothing else really seems embarrassing
If that’s the most embarrassing moment of your life you’ve lived an easy life.