Just bought a sick vacuum. PGP.

I’m seeing how long I can go without shaving before management says something because I can’t afford new razor blades until payday. PGP

My desk chair was taken away to use in a meeting. I had to stand all morning. I have a broken foot. PGP.

My boss just used the phrase “in that aspect” twice in the same sentence. PGP.

Got caught Tindering during a meeting. I then had to explain to several of my managers what Tinder was. I can’t tell if they are disgusted or sorry for me. PGP.

Until recently, I thought Ariana Grande was a font in Microsoft Office. PGP.

Got four fortune cookies with my order, because apparently I ordered enough food to feed a family of four. PGP.

The first place I wore my fitbit was a Waffle House. PGP.

Got a flu shot because the company paid me $20 for it. PGP.

Can officially cross being catfished off the list. PGP.