The walk of shame now being the distance from the restroom to your cubicle after being in there for an absurd amount of time. PGP.

Turning down.

I literally do not know how to ask for days off.

If my headphones ever came out, I would be fired.

Sometimes I just sit in my car and scream. PGP.

I don’t remember the last time my gas tank was full.

Making sure everyone in the office knows you came in on the weekend.

I’d love to quit, but if I can get them to fire me, I get severance and unemployment. PGP.

Seriously neglecting routine auto maintenance.