Finding out the real world doesn’t celebrate Columbus Day, the hard way. PGP.

You can tell a lot about a man from his shoes. Like how often he poops at work. PGP.

My little brother just graduated law school in the top five percent of his class. My dog got kicked out of obedience school. PGP.

Rewarding yourself for not drinking Monday and Tuesday by getting hammered before 6pm on a Wednesday. PGP.

My office has started playing Christmas music. PGP.

Today I had to use a sick day for another job interview. My boss called my doctor. PGP.

“Corporate Accounts Payable, Nina speaking. Just a moment.” PGP.

My coworker just got engaged to someone she met on Tinder two months ago. PGP.

Shamelessly “nice work”ing all my comments. PGP.