When things get hard, I go into the bathroom and listen to Styx’s “Come Sail Away” and remember my Caribbean cruise from three years ago.

Just realized I requested 4/20 off and now my boss thinks I’m a stoner.

Who needs birth control when you can just listen to your coworkers bitch about their kids all day, everyday.

The coworker who sits between us got promoted, and now Steve won’t stop trying to talk to me. PGP.

Another day, another dollar. Well after taxes and inflation, it’s more like 72 cents. PGP.

Just found out I’m working a full day Christmas Eve and the day after Christmas. PGP.

If your name is Steve, does that automatically make you the Steve in your office? PGP.

We don’t have a Steve in my office. PGP.

I still fucking hate Steve. PGP.

Paying just as much towards your student loans as you do to finance your furniture. PGP.