Partner just said “It’s lit.” PGP.

I woke up feeling hungover and haven’t drank in 4 days

I put in maybe 3 hours of real work everyday. During my 3 month review, my manager described me as “professional, attentive, and a quick worker.” PGPM?

When you see the requisition for the job you just interviewed for reopened.

Accidentally referred to myself as an alcoholic instead of a workaholic in a phone interview. At least I told the truth. PGP.

The supplies in my office aren’t worth stealing. PGP

Tried to relive college last night. Getting a swift kick from reality this morning. PGP

Your alma mater is now a top party school. PGP

It’s that time on Friday when I stop caring.

Panicking because you forgot to put on a belt then remembering you’ll be working at a cubicle all day. PGP