Watering down your humor to make it office appropriate. PGP.
My girlfriend and I just moved in together and now she farts in front of me. PGP.
People you’ve never met endorsing you on LinkedIn. PGP.
The automatic toilet flushing mid-shit. PGP.
My co-worker said he had the “gift of gab,” but really he has the “curse of not being able to shut the fuck up”. PGP.
The light sensors in the bathroom last seven minutes. Feels like 30 seconds. PGP.
Being that guy who brings store bought items to the monthly company potluck. PGP.
Wondering what would happen if I just “forgot” to come back to work after lunch. PGP.
FICA tax is making me resent my grandma. PGP.
The metrics I’m evaluated on contradict each other. PGP.