The transition from exhaustion to near anxiety attack after your morning coffee. PGP.

Trying to answer the job interview question, “What is your greatest weakness?” by mentioning weaknesses that are non-essential to the job. PGP.

Empathizing with Bud Kilmer on his views of high school kids. PGP.

Some porn stars make about as much as I do in a month in an hour, and they get fucked in the good way. PGP.

I could accomplish a week’s worth of work in about 6 hours. Why can’t I leave when I am done? PGP.

Lying about your profession at the bar because what you really do for a living is an instant conversation killer. PGP.

When I was asked what I wanted to be when I grew up, this did not come to mind. PGP.

Buying a LASIK Groupon and actually using it. PGP.

“Hi, what’s your name?” “Married.” PGP.

“Does this tie match?” PGP.

Office morale would skyrocket if “Hump Day” actually involved humping. PGP.

Spending money on a Candy Crush level and still not beating it. PGP.