Old enough to find grey hairs, young enough to still get pimples. PGP.

“Thanks for sharing” is the workplace equivalent of “cool story bro.” PGP.

Getting called the wrong name by a superior, and instead of correcting them just thinking “close enough.” PGP.

I look at my fantasy team and think, “How did it come to this?” PGP.

Being told to put your job title in your voicemail. PGP.

“Please confirm your confirmation.” PGP.

I have the microwave cook times for frozen dinners memorized. PGP.

Getting pathetically excited over saving 67 cents with your Target Red Card. PGP.

Scheduling things you want to do and buy in coordination with payday. PGP.

Do I actually have to give out candy on Halloween this year? PGP.

Worrying about what’s for dinner while eating lunch. PGP.

Excessive coughing to prove everyone you weren’t faking when you called in sick the past two days. PGP.