I think I’m going to go on a juice cleanse. PGP.

Driving and emailing is now a much more significant issue than driving and texting. PGP.

An older and incredibly out of shape coworker suggesting that the two of you start working out together. PGP.

Only filling your water bottle halfway so you can make more trips to the break room. PGP.

Having a predetermined spot in your desk drawer for plastic forks and napkins. PGP.

When your hairline and waistline are racing in opposite directions. PGP.

Unleashing hell during the five seconds after someone else flushes. PGP.

I want a Dyson vacuum so bad. PGP.

Responding with “thank you” after being told you are being fired. PGP.

Locking your computer screen every time you leave your desk so no one can look at all the work you haven’t been doing. PGP.

That one guy in the sales room that talks WAY louder into his headset than is necessary. PGP.

When browsing Match.com profiles gives you the same amount of excitement as browsing fantasy football free agents. PGP.