Being guilt-tripped into buying Girl Scout cookies from your coworker’s kid while you’re trying to stay true to your “get fit” New Year’s resolution. PGP.

The closest you’ve come to tapping a keg in the past two years has been replacing the water cooler in the break room. PGP.

I have a mental list of maneuvers to get me out of eye contact or conversations with people I pass in the hallway. PGP.

I hate the way my boss sneezes. PGP.

Sometimes, the best part of my day is giving a fake name at Starbucks. PGP.

“Let’s really be proactive about this.” PGP.

I wish an orchestra would start playing music to let coworkers know they’ve been talking too long. PGP.

When living with a roommate becomes living with a couple. PGP.

Parking in the same spot everyday…at the back of the lot. PGP.

Moving your contributions in your 401k like you’re managing a fantasy team roster. PGP.

I’m “It’s 8:30, and you want to start a movie this late?” years old. PGP.

Worked for two months prepping a case and client for court. My boss didn’t go to court on the day of trial because of a toothache. PGP.