Sent Jurgen Klinsmann’s Permission Slip to my manager as a joke 4 hours ago. He has not responded or acknowledged the e-mail. I think I might get fired. PGP.

Putting a “Welcome” mat at the entrance of your cube because you spend more time there than at your actual home. PGP.

Stuck between my office’s strict ” No dating in the workplace” policy and my inability to meet anyone outside of the workplace. PGP.

Doing the math and realizing you’ve already spent an entire paycheck on weddings this summer. PGP.

Would anyone notice if I kept my shoes off when I went to the bathroom? PGP.

Leaving my job in a week. All this time, I didn’t realize it was possible to do so little work and get away with it. PGP.

There’s a dead animal in the wall at the office. I’ve never seen anyone here more excited. PGP.

Feeling like a criminal when a LinkedIn connection endorses you for something you have no idea how to do. PGP.

To open the video Snapchat at work, or not. PGP.

Having your phone charger at your desk, but not at your apartment. PGP.

The next 5 to 10 generations of LeBron James’ relatives already have more money than I ever will. PGP.

I tried so hard, and got so far, but in the end it doesn’t even matter. PGP.