Took Saturday night off due to a bad case of heartburn. PGP.

Having to scroll down to find your birth year when registering for stuff online. PGP.

Not even having wi-fi in the office. PGP.

Now that it’s sweater weather, I can wear my stained dress shirts again. PGP.

Getting excited when receiving a Target gift card because it’s a sensible and practical gift. PGP.

I just changed my Netflix password and got angry texts from three of my exes. HBO Go is next. PGPM.

Wanting socks for Christmas. PGP.

Everything in my cube shakes when my coworkers walk by. PGP.

Leftovers have already gone bad. PGP.

Happy wife means fuck my life. PGP.

The less people I have to talk to in the morning, the better. PGP.

I could have ironed my shirt in the time I spent deciding if I needed to iron my shirt. PGP